‘Tis the season to be jolly, Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la’, or is it?
When you combine a family with a family business, the holidays can sometimes be less than Jolly. The lines between family and business life can be blurry in a family business making it less than optimal to separate the two.
Remember this holiday season when you get together with your family to separate the dinner table from the boardroom table consciously. While it may not be easy to do, setting clear boundaries that your family discusses and agrees to will help pave a candy cane path of less stress and anxiety.
To help keep your holidays merry and bright here are a few tips to discuss with your family members prior to getting together. The discussion can be via, email, FaceTime, or any other method that works for your family, the point is to discuss the boundaries and get their agreement and buy -in on all points prior to your first get-together. Don’t wait until you get together to set the rules.
Boundaries to consider:
• Business Talk: Business discussions can be very uncomfortable for some members of the family and may not include other family members, so perhaps set sometimes during the holidays when these conversations are off limits. It could be during dinner or other specific times that you decide on. If a discussion turns to business you can promptly stop it by referring back to the pre-holiday discussion where you all agreed on not talking business at that point in time (during meals, etc).
• Business Talk Zones: It is hard not to have business discussions during the holidays since everyone is together. Set up a designated area where business can be discussed such as the den or home office. If business needs to be discussed, all who should or need to be involved can go to the designated area to have the discussion. Leaving other family members to have their own nonbusiness discussions in other areas of the house.
• Determine Business Talk hours or Specific Meeting times: At some point over the holidays you will need to have some business discussions, so set up times that business can be discussed. Pre-determined talk times, such as after breakfast but before noon, or even better schedule a meeting on a day and time you will all be together, it will lessen the frustration of trying to accommodate everyone’s personal schedule.
• Plan Family Activities: Having planned activities that require everyone’s participation, such as board games, a family skate, playing games around the dining table, or a card game tournament will take the focus from business and back on creating family memories.
• Cell Phone Boundaries: Almost everyone has a cell phone these days, and more time can be spent scrolling through social media or answering emails than actually talking or engaging with the people around you. It is not just the younger generations that are caught up in this bad social habit. Just like business talk, set acceptable times when your phones can be accessed and when they can’t (during meals, etc). You will be amazed at what you can learn when you talk to each other.
Bottom Line
To ensure a smooth and enjoyable holiday get-together this year, it’s essential to establish boundaries and plan activities ahead of time. Disagreements on boundaries are inevitable, so ensure you involve everyone (or at least each branch of the family) in the decision-making process. Encourage everyone to express their thoughts, feelings, and concerns, this way, each person feels heard and valued, even if they don’t agree with every boundary set. While not everyone will be thrilled with every rule, having a say in the process will help them accept and understand the guidelines. By encouraging this type of open communication, and respect for each other, you will be creating a family holiday of peace and harmony. Or at least as peaceful and harmonious as any stress-filled holiday can get.
Cheers!
Have a Happy Holiday and a Fabulous 2025!
Tammy